True, it has been a while since I've updated but I have been extremely busy with my job. I've spent alot of time trying to beat my high score on Solitare on my intern's computer. She's a nice young lady, wears very tight clothes too.
The other day Janet Reno tried to put the moves on me but I said no way. I'm not letting any transvestite stick their hoo-ha in my anus.
As for the September 11th issue, that my lawyers and secretaries have been writing endless speeches for me about, I'd just like to say that we'd be better off nuking that son of bitch Osama. They told me that since we don't know his exact whereabouts that we can't exactly do that. I say we just bomb the fuck out of Europe and the Middle East. That way we're bound to get him. Who cares about all those people, they aren't citizens of MY country so I don't really give two shits if they like me anyways.
Not much else to report. Have a good afternoon.